Hey there May 2013! When did you get here?

Glory, glory hallelujah! I survived!  April is over! And so is my life as I know it.  And at the moment I'm ok with it.  I'm even excited about it?  Maybe.  Weird.

Change.  Bitter sweet. 

I'm excited for this semester to be over.  Spring 2013 Semester was a difficult one.  I had some awesome experiences.  And some not so awesome experiences.  I feel much more grown up now.  I don't want to grow up. 

I'm nervous to be done with college.  I remember back when I was in first grade, part of my ID number was the year I would graduate high school.  2009.  I remember thinking that year would never come.  I mean, we were knee deep in the 90's then my friend.  And y2k would kill us all anyway.  Can you say new millennium?  And computers taking over the world?  And yet here we are four years after that year I thought would never come. 

I remember when I was in Young Women's, it must have been shortly after I turned twelve.  We were asked to set short-term and long-term goals.  Goals for the next ten years.  I remember thinking how ghastly old I would be when I turned twenty-two.  Gosh I couldn't really imagine it.  I knew by the time I was twenty-two I would have my crap together.  Everything would be under control and life would be perfect.  I would surely be married, maybe have a baby, and definitely be a BYU graduate.  Haha life is funny.

But more generally I knew that I would be a college graduate at age twenty-two.  And I graduate on Friday.  And turn twenty-two on Wednesday.  Goal accomplished. 

Accomplishing goals is a weird thing.  I suppose I should feel more accomplished than I do.  I'm glad it's over.  But I don't really know what to do next in my life.  You're supposed to set a new goal after you accomplish a goal right?  But "it's very strange.  I've been in the getting an education/being a student business so long, I don't know what to do with the rest of my life."  And no, I haven't considered piracy (Name that movie). 

But I'm excited.  This is a time of great opportunities and so many options for me.  I feel comforted because I know that I've been guided by a loving Heavenly Father to this point in my life.  And I've had many of my choices confirmed to me today. 

I don't know how it will all work out.  I just know that it will all work out.

What Has Gotten Me Through The Past Few Weeks Since Spring Break

1. My parents.  I'm pretty sure I've been on the phone with them a ton the past few weeks.

2. This quote from my Girls State days:

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others." - Nelson Mandela

3. "I Have Confidence" from The Sound of Music. Yeah I've been playing this song over and over.

"I have confidence in confidence alone. 

Besides what you see I have confidence in me."

 

Now I'm just hoping to get through the next two weeks.  Two weeks.  I can do it.  

Quick Post

It's been a long time since I've blogged, and my life's been pretty crazy.  Here's a quick recap of the past month or so.

• EFY prep has been really cool.  I've learned a lot.  I'm a little overwhelmed at the thought of being a counselor, especially because I've never really done anything like it before.  It's another one of the many "first's" I've experienced this past year.
• I've got a new job.  I will no longer be calling U of U alumni asking them to donate money to the U.  Instead I will be working with special needs people helping them to get jobs or to work effectively in the job they already have.  I'm excited and nervous for this opportunity as well.  It's going to be another learning experience because I also have never done anything like this before.
• I've started volunteering with a hospice.  The little lady I help is so adorable and funny.  The hour that I spend with her on Sunday's is probably the highlight of my whole week, every week.
• I got a scholarship!  (woot woot!)  Yay for free money for school.
• I got to visit my family over spring break.  :)
• Community is back on NBC!!  :)
• Other than that my life has just been lots of school, homework, visiting teaching, volunteering at Primary's, vampire's stealing my blood (blood draws), roommate drama, and more homework.

I am a Human Development and Family Studies Major

There.

I said it.

And I didn't qualify it.

Every single time someone asks me the inevitable college get to know you question I get a little nervous.  The second I say "Human Development" I get "the look".  I know that look, because I used to give that look.  It's the look that says "What in the world do you expect to do with that major?  Get your MRS degree and then start popping out babies and be a stay at home mom?  What if something happens and you have to provide for your family?  You can't provide for a family with that degree!" And like I said, I used to give "that look" too.  I remember going on a campus tour at BYU and passing the building that they said is where all the family and consumer sciences classes are.  I scoffed and thought to myself "Yeah, all the girls who are counting on getting married, dropping out of college, and being taken care of the rest of their lives. Ha."  Yeah, I was a little judgmental when I was seventeen.  Just a little bit. But I could be because I knew everything back then. I digress.  A few years, a little experience, and a lot of prayers later here I am trying to come to terms with my major.  I always feel like I have to defend what I am studying and why I am studying it.  My answer is almost always "My major is Human Development it's the program that will help me become a Child Life Specialist which is kind of like a play therapist at a hospital." It's a long and awkward explanation. But after that long explanation everyone is pretty much like "Ok, so you actually have a plan for your life." But at the same time I get tired of explaining myself and my life plans in the first five minutes of meeting someone.  And there is a part of me that thinks that I shouldn't have to explain myself and my choice of major to the world.

I was thinking about this today.  I was also thinking about the classes I'm taking and how they relate to families.   I was listening to the Mormon Channel program about families. I realized that this is my way to help families.  It is something that I have control over that will be helping families.  The family is under attack. This is how I can help the family. I realized that I don't have to explain or defend myself and my major and I don't have to feel like I'm pursuing a major that isn't really a good major.  It is an excellent major.  I am glad to be a Human Development and Family Studies Major.

So I Should Be Studying BUT . . .

taking pictures sounded like a lot more fun!  :)

Plans for this weekend?

• Gymnastics Meet
• Dinner with the Roomies
• Saturday Night Game Night

Oh and I'm pretty sure that I set a record today by how fast I took my Popular Music Test today.  18 minutes, and I was able to triple check my answers.  Best part?  That was the hardest test of the semester in that class.  :)

Having it all and Hanging out and Other lessons learned in school

So my classes have kinda got me thinking lately.  It's weird, I know, but I guess that's what college is supposed to do, make you think.  First I came across this loverly quote in my parenting text book (yes I am taking a parenting class, no I am not in college just for my MRS degree I actually have plans for a very meaningful job and this class just happens to be a requirement to get that job!)  :)

"We are a generation of young women raise to believe we can do it all. We also need the self-displine and wisdom to understand we can't do it all right now." - Jennifer Regen Bisbee

I think that is so true.  Yes we are able to do whatever to do whatever we want to do.  But we can't do everything right now and all at the same time.  The hard part is deciding what is the most important thing to do first and balancing everything you want and need to do.

In my institute class we were discussing the difference between "hanging out" and "dating" like it is talked about in this amazing article.  A lot of the guys (notice the usage of the word guys)  got very defensive as all of the girls in the room talked about how we want to go on dates not just hang out.  It was very interesting because this had been on my mind for a little while now.  I just don't know how to make it any more clear to the guys and men out there that we actually want to go out on dates and not just hang out.  Elder Oaks talks about "lock[ing] the pantry and bolt[ing] the front door [and] . . . hang[ing] up a sign, 'Will open for individual dates,'"

Well boys, guys, and men, my door is locked and there is a sign on my door.

Now dates don't need to be expensive or a big deal.  Anything that lets you have a chance to get to know the other person is a good date (ie not a movie).  And the great thing about dates is that they have a start and end time. 

But other than that, we girls aren't very picky, we just want real inexpensive dates that let us get to know you and have a start and end time.  That's all.

Then I was reading one of my textbooks about early childhood development and it was talking about how early childhood is from the ages of 0-8.  I found that rather interesting.  What happens to LDS boys and girls when they turn 8?  They are baptised.  We believe that they are then old enough and have learned enough to know basic right from wrong and to start making some of their own choices.  We believe that before the age of 8 children are learning right from wrong.  It was interesting reading about how important learning up to the age of 8 is in a secular world.  It made me think, "Hmm, I wonder if Joseph Smith was an Early Childhood Development major and realized how kids view the world before the age of 8?"  I don't think he did.  I believe that it was inspired revelation to a prophet of God from a God who is an Early Childhood Development major, who would realize the learning that takes place at such a young age.

Then I was reading in my parenting textbook about the three styles of parenting, Authoritarian, Authoritative, and Permissive (Authoritative is the good one.)  I believe that I have Heavenly Parents, so I applied that to what I was learning and thought to myself, "Is Heavenly Father Authoritarian, Authoritative, and Permissive?"  Now of course the answer to this is "the gospel according to Kelsi" but the conclusion I came to is that He has to be Authoritative.  Think about it.  He isn't authoritarian because he gave us our agency, our ability to choose.  He doesn't force us to do anything.  And He explains why He wants us to do things (or why He doesn't want us to do things.)  But He isn't permissive either.  While we have the ability to make choices, we do not have the ability to choose the consequences, and He let's us know what the consequences are.  He is an authoritative parent.  He sets down clear guidlines of what He would have us do, He explains the "why?" behind most of it, and He keeps an honest open relationship with us (if we choose to accept that relationship and put forth the effort required.)  He truely cares about us and if we slow down long enough to listen, He will let us know that.

Anyway, that's my long ramble of the night of what I've been paying to learn in college.  I hope I didn't bore you too much.  :)

Fall and Winter Roommate Adventure Pictures

These pictures aren't necessairily in order, but they show just some of the many adventures my roommates and I have embarked on.  Enjoy!  :)